I understand the frustration. Doesn't mean I completely share it, but I certainly get where you're coming from. I can say, from years and years of experience, that nearly all aquaphiles are in to "water peril" to some degree. What's interesting is that in pretty much all the drowning fiction I've read, the sexual fixation is absolutely on the buildup and the act of drowning, but death usually gets handwaved, by convenient resuscitation of means magical or otherwise.
The really interesting thing is that if you look at people that are aquaphiles and are into drowning, and look at the other stuff they produce, the pictures they fave, the artists they watch-- there's no overlap with breathplay, snuff, or anything else. It's isolated to that one specific fetish. (I'll call out Felixpath as an exception I've found, but he's the only one I can think of.)
Firsthand, I can say it's not like it's a guilt thing. If a story has drowning and the character dies, it's not a total bonerkill. That said, for me, it's way hotter if they don't. My personal tastes, ever since I was a tiny babby that hadn't yet turned his fetish into a sexual fetish, was towards being submerged underwater for an unreasonably long time. By "unreasonable", I also mean unrealistic. It's the kind of thing you'd see in cartoons or video games, and I imagine it's where a lot of people got their start. It's the kind of Wile E Coyote logic where you can do things to a character that should cause them to perish a dozen times over, but after a quick transition, they're in tip-top shape. Or in a video game, where you can keel over as much as you want, and every single time you reappear, as you were, with maybe a small setback (like your lives counter taking a dent). The epitome of this particular flavor of the fetish (and there's quite a lot of this specific kind), is where a character chooses to submerge themselves until they drown for sexual gratification, and aren't any worse off for the wear.
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